Lifes Little Blessings

Today has been off to a great start. One of my Delta Gamma girls, Kortney, and her mom, came by this morning for an early visit for about two hours which was really enjoyable! I love catching up with all my DG’s. I believe next week Sarah W is coming to town as well as my DG little sis Kirsten and Sara E at some point during the week. Also on Monday Sheila is coming during the day…I have been blessed with lots of amazing friends. Speaking of which I would like to share a dream another friend had about the boys and I. Meagan called me the other day and said that the night before she had been praying about the boys, Ryan and I and then had a dream that felt so real…

I was going into labor and she said that for whatever reason she was there as well as my parents and Ryan. I got to have a natural birth just as I wanted and within a few minutes the first little screaming baby was out (Jason) and he was fine as could be. He was big, healthy, and screaming at the top of his lungs. Next came Reece…she said that Reece didn’t make any noise when he came out and this sent me into total panic mode. She said they didn’t show me either of the babies and quickly took them off to the NICU and I was to the point of completely tripping out. A little bit later after everyone was in the room they allowed me to go down to see the babies. She said it was the weirdest thing because I was in tears looking over them and reached out and squeezed her arm as the nurse said they are going to just fine. She said it was one of those dreams you wake up from feeling like it actually just happened and had to hare it with me. I am so gad she did because like she said she really felt like it was a message from God…and in my mind even if that is not the way it plays out it still gives me hope that my little boys are going to hang in there and beat the odds!

To think that come Monday I will have been on bed rest now for a month blows my mind. In a months time I have missed out on saying goodbye to my friends in Tyler, saying goodbye to my students and teacher friends at Jack, final going away pictures, a baby shower, senior ceremony for Delta Gamma and of course graduation which takes place tomorrow. It’s funny because I honestly do not feel like college is over and that by this time tomorrow I will have graduated. I guess part of it is because I have worked my rear end off for the last 4 years to be done on time and now with all that’s going on its overlooked and rather insignificant in the grand scheme of things. A part of me still wants to go back and relive those memories and an even bigger part of me says no, the best memories are still yet to come. I guess the reality of going from a college student for the last 4 years to a Mom with no in between is what throws it all off. Literally the night before I came home for Easter weekend I was sitting in the living room talking with my roommates and by the next week was in the hospital in Webster where I will leave and return back to life with two kids. Rather mind blowing at times…If somebody would have asked me at 18 where do you see yourself in 5 years anyone that is someone who knows would have known that it wasn’t to be married or with kids. Its funny how life never takes you where you see yourself going. It as is the future is already paved for you and no matter what roads you take you will reach your final destination no matter how many detours you try to take along the way.

Tonight Ryan is going to come back and stay at the hospital with me. The boys are still doing just the same and although I would love for them to say everything looks normal I know that that is not very likely. So for now, I am happy with no change because no change means nothing worse has happened. Ryan has been a trooper through all of this with me. I am so thankful for the times he tells me to stop worrying and to just relax even though I know in the back of his mind he is just being strong for mine and the boys sake. The time we have spent together has really added a lot of building blocks to our relationship and luckily they are all good ones. Its funny how even now we are still learning something new about each other everyday. Over the weekend we worked on a puzzle together and he turned to me and said we make a pretty good team. It made me laugh and of course smile because even though we do have our difference at times we come together in the end and do make a “good team”. On Monday night we started wrapping up the puzzle and then the nurse came in to monitor me and the boys. Ryan continued working away and then came over to me with the last piece and laid it on my little roll away table for me to finish off. Sometimes it’s the little things in life that seem insignificant that can bring a smile to your face!

Okay well I am finding myself rambling and said I was going to take a nap this afternoon before starting the Twilight series but that might not happen. I think I may shower in place of the nap and then begin reading. I have added pictures of flowers that have been sent to me, crib pictures (that I thought I had already posted but didn’t), belly shots and other baby gifts. Thank you again to everyone for your love, prayers and support. They are working and keeping my little boys safe and sound! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!